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Oh my, it’s been almost two years to the date since I last posted. Sorry for such a long hiatus. With the prompting of many (ok, really, just a few) I’ve decided to give this here blog another whirl. I can’t promise I’ll stick to it, but I will try, darn it. I will try.

Let’s see, since I left my dear old blog sitting and rotting not much has changed in my life.

We adopted a new kitteh…Waffle. I was NOT at all for this new addition but my, then, 11 yr. old child talked me into it by saying, “He’s cheaper than a Wii or Xbox”. Ha. If only I had known how much $ this little boy would cost me with his food allergies and habit of eating string & clothing! He is a cutie pie, though so I guess we’ll keep him.

I now have a 13 yr. old with blue hair…

Oops. Wrong picture.

Here we go….

I gained a ton of weight from boozing it up…

And baking and eating yummy crap non-stop….

Haha. I really DIDN’T become a boozer…I just had to use that photo somewhere on here! I did, however, gain a ton of weight because of my obsession with making homemade rice pudding, cherry cobbler and mac & cheese. Someone had to eat it!

I lost a ton of weight because I stopped baking and started eating only fruits & veggies and lean protein. This is a true story. Yay, me!

I became a photographer (I think I’ve always been a photographer, it’s just that now I get paid to do it so it seems more real!)…

Check me out, please: sharongollnitzphotography.com

Oh, and I started making a line of lip balm and all natural body products…

I bought a new (used) vehicle with all the gobs of money I’m making. Um, yeah. If that were true it wouldn’t be a 2005 Santa Fe.

And that, my friends, is all I’ve done in the past 2 years. Sorry to disappoint.

Let’s hope something exciting happens in the next few days so I have something to write about!

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It’s been a while (hasn’t it?) since I partook in a meme so here’s a fun one that I got ages ago from the lovely and talented JavaQueen:

The rules:

You leave a comment on this post requesting a letter and I’ll assign you one. You write about ten things you love that begin with your assigned letter, and post it at your place. When people comment on your list, you give them a letter, and the chain continues on and on.

Here we go, in no specific order:

1. Beer.

beer

2. Bailey – my wonderful, deceased dog.

bailey1-copy

3. Bacon…’cause come on, who DOESN’T love bacon?

bacon

4. Bull’s Eyes. (Not the actual eyes of a bull but those yummy caramel cream confections that I eat by the bagful)

bulls-eyes

5. Beaches (not the movie, silly…a hot, sandy beach!)

6. Blogging.

7. British accents. Or a man with ANY accent, for that matter.

gerardYUM!

8. Amy Butler fabric (ok, that was a bit of a cheat…but her last name begins with B!).

amybut

9. Boys (um, men really, ’cause I’m no cradle robber).

10. Boots (especially my Ugg-like warm, cozy winter boots).

There you have it. If you want to play along just leave a comment and ask for a letter.

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The weather in New York state is all but predictable. A few days ago I woke to find the thermometer reading -5 degrees. Holy shit, that’s cold even for a born and bred Northerner. Then, a few days later it’s a whopping 50 degrees. Yep, that’s right. And people wonder why I’m so cranky.

Since it had warmed up so much I figured it was about time that I took the rotting pumpkin off my front porch and threw it in the compost pile. I was finally able to make my way out the back door, across the deck (which now only has about one foot of compacted snow/ice on it as opposed to the 3 feet of snow it had on it a week ago) and out to the compost pile behind the garage. But…not without incident. You see, as I approached the steps leading down to the backyard my heel hit a piece of ice and WHHHHOOOOOSH! There I went. Sliding at full speed down the steps (which were actually more like an ice slide since I hadn’t shoveled them in months) and landing with a hard cruuunch on my ass. Ouch. Surprisingly enough, I didn’t drop the pumpkin. It was still planted firmly in my hands which meant that my ass took a terrible beating since I didn’t use my hands to break the fall. I started laughing, as I often do when I do something foolish and get hurt. Both of the dogs were outside and Gus came rushing to my side, licking my face as I laughed hysterically. I was still lying on the ground when I looked up to see this coming at me:

dsc05289-1

Yeah. Crazy. Ferocious. Dog.

Ridley gets spastic in the snow and it didn’t help that his mom was lying there laughing, holding a pumpkin. He came bounding toward me and pounced right on top of me. Barking and nipping like his Borderline Collie self. He then decided this was going to be a get-the-pumpkin game and started coming at me from all sides trying to pry the rotting pumpkin from my hands. This made me laugh even harder. And then it happened. I peed my pants. Oh, come on! Don’t tell me that if you fell on your ass into the cold, melting snow you, TOO, wouldn’t wet yourself!

By the time I got myself up and walked into the house, tears were streaming down my cheeks from laughing so hard. My child just looked at me, shook her head in disgust and in her motherly tone said, “What is wrong with you?” I didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth so I crept upstairs and hit the shower. Damn weather. Damn dogs. Damn bladder.

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Four Play

I borrowed this meme from Teeni and Mr. Parkour (see how nice I am…no more stealing)

4 things I did today:

Painted
Took the pups for a nice, long walk
Took pics of the fall leaves
Made goulash and apple crisp

4 things on my to do list:

Take a much needed vacation
Settle on one color for the dining room walls and stick with it
Finish all the projects in my home that I’ve started and can’t seem to complete
Meet the man of my dreams

4 of my guiltiest pleasures:

Sleeping & being lazy
Red wine (bottles and bottles of it)
Doritos and Bison French Onion Dip
Caramel Bulls-Eyes (yee haw!)

4 random facts about me

I’m very grumpy if I don’t get my coffee fix first thing in the a.m.
I’m a worrier; worry, worry, worry
I often feel like I’m moving in all directions and can’t seem to settle on which way to go
I’m a HUGE procrastinator

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Picture This!

Here’s a fun little photo meme I swiped a while back from Pammy Girl and Nandandgo. Sorry ladies, I’m a thief, it’s true.

It’s pretty straightforward. You are to go around your house with the following list and take pictures AS IS (no cleaning aloud ’cause that’s called CHEATING). Luckily, I had recently (recent, as in this summer) cleaned and I wasn’t required to take a photo of the dining room – because the dining room table is the catch-all and is COMPLETELY covered with junk. Sometimes I forget I even have a dining room table since I can’t see it.

I’m pretty sure you were just supposed to post one pic per room but, oh well, I took a bunch of photos ’cause I like to show ‘n tell.

Living Room

My living room is HUGE so I had to take three pictures for you to get the ‘full effect’. Unfortunately, the dog crates take up almost half of the freakin’ room.

Laundry Room

Pretty basic. Washer. Dryer. Shelves.

Kitchen sink

Boring…

You really want to see my entire kitchen, don’t you???

This is my favorite part of my kitchen…my espresso machine. Oooooo, ahhhhh…

Closet

Arrgggghhhh. Just looking at it makes me hyper ventilate. This is the ONLY real closet in the house. My house was built in 1910…apparently, before the invention of closets. None of the bedrooms had closets so we built little closet-like cubbies in the corners for extra storage.

This is the cubbie in my bedroom; it holds all the bed linens (the top shelf is completely crammed full of pillow cases – I have a habit of collecting them):

Toilet

My bathroom is teeny tiny…the toilet is hiding around the left corner. I could only back up so far – it was hard for me to get an entire shot of the ‘twoilet’. Heck, you’ve see one toilet, you’ve seen ’em all. *Notice the lovely blue wallpaper that I hung myself. Love, love, love it…even though it was a shitty, cheap paper and I ended up hanging it not once, not twice, but three times (the third time using super glue). Nothing like spending an evening hanging wallpaper, walking into that room the next morning and seeing all the paper curling off the walls. Grrrrr.

Fridge

Yeah, I know. Crammed full of stuff. Remember…I’m keeping EVERYTHING from my cupboards in the fridge to keep all those nasty moths away.

Shoes

This is just a sampling. These are the shoes I throw into one of the many cubbies. Many of these shoes don’t even see the light of day. I wear them once or twice and throw them back into the pile.

And here are the shoes that I wear the most. They get a prestigious spot on the porch floor. Lucky shoes.

The Kids

Human kid

Canine Kids

Feline Kid

Self Portrait

This is me, first thing in the morning. Bwhahahaha! NOT. Don’t be silly, first thing in the morning I need a coffee IV. This is me at the end of an exhausting day. Beer was definitely needed.

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It seems that most of you didn’t want to play with me on this one. Poo on you (just kidding…my musical tastes are, apparently, a bit ‘all over the place’ so I don’t blame you for not guessing) Here are the answers:

1. Barenaked Ladies, “Life in a Nutshell”

2. Modest Mouse, “Float On”

3. Blue Rodeo, “Rain Down on Me”

4. Depeche Mode, “Blasphemous Rumors”

5. Duran Duran, “Girls on Film”

6. Garbage, “Stupid Girl”

7. Bryan Ferry, “Oh Yeah”

8. R.E.M., “Letter Never Sent”

9. Beck, “Beercan”

10. Wilco, “Pot Kettle Black”

11. Crowded House, “How Will You Go”

12. Eve 6, “Inside Out”

13. David Bowie, “Fashion”

14. James, “Sit Down”

15. George Michael, “Too Funky”

16. Cake, “Short Skirt/Long Jacket”

17. Ben Folds, “Rockin’ the Suburbs”

18. Flaming Lips, “The Wand”

19. Adam Ant, “Desperate Not Serious”

20. Our Lady Peace, “Clumsy”

Oooo…don’t you just want to bonk yourself in the head for not guessing those??? I thought so.

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It’s time for yet another meme. I snagged this one from Taoist Biker. Sorry, I’m a thief, we all know that by now. But he, apparently, stole it as well so I’m not feeling terribly bad about my thievery. This one’s great fun because you all get to play along. Woo hoo. The rules are as such:

1. Put your mp3 player or music player on your computer on random.
2. Post the first four lines from the first 20 songs that play, no matter how embarrassing the song (skip repeat artists).
3. Post and let everyone you know guess (in the comments!) what song and artist the lines come from.
4. Please play fair. Don’t be a dirty rotten cheater and Google the lyrics!

I have a feeling mine are going to be pretty darn easy to guess, but who knows, maybe I’ll stump you. Good luck everyone. Have fun!

1.
When she was three
Her Barbies always did it on the first date
Now she’s with me
There’s never any need for them to demonstrate

2.
I backed my car into a cop car, the other day
Well he just drove off, sometimes life’s ok
I ran my mouth off a bit too much, oh what did I say
Well you just laughed it off, it was all ok

3.
We’ve never need forgiveness
Left home at seventeen
Raised up on hate
To a life that’s second rate

4.
Girl of sixteen, whole life ahead of her
Slashed her wrists, bored with life
Didn’t succeed, thank the Lord
For small mercies

5.
See them walking hand in hand across the bridge at midnight
Heads turning as the lights flashing out it’s so bright
Then walk right out to the fourline track
There’s a camera rolling on her back, on her back

6.
You pretend you’re high
You pretend you’re bored
You pretend you’re anything
Just to be adored

7.
Some expression in your eyes
Overtook me by surprise
Where was I how was I to know’
How can we drive to a movie show

8.
It’s been pretty simple so far, vacation in Athens is calling me
And knock, knock, knock on wood, I thought I’d left you behind
Heaven is yours, heaven is yours, heaven’s yours where I live
The thought of the catacombs left my soul at home

9.
Alcohol on my hands, I got plans to ditch myself and get outside
Dancing women throwing plates, decapitating their laughing dates
Swirling chickens caught in flight, out of focus and much to bright
Coming down, shiny teeth, game show suckers trying to breathe

10.
Crazy rides rockets
Who has a magic wand
Empty out your pockets
Words without a song

11.
Escape is on your mind again
Escape to a far away land
At times it seems there is no end
To long hard nights of drinking

12.
I would swallow my pride,
I would choke on the rinds,
but the lack thereof would leave me empty inside,
swallow my doubt

13.
There’s a brand new dance but I don’t know its name
That people from bad homes do again and again
Its big and its bland full of tension and fear
They do it over there but we don’t do it here

14.
I sing myself to sleep
A song from the darkest hour
Secrets I can’t keep
Inside of the day

15.
Hey, you’re just too funky for me,
I gotta get inside of you,
And I’ll show you heaven if you let me.
Hey you just too funky for me,

16.
I want a girl with a mind like a diamond
I want a girl who knows what’s best
I want a girl with shoes that cut
And eyes that burn like cigarettes

17.
Let me tell ya’ll what it’s like
Being male, middle class and white
It’s a bitch, if you don’t believe
Listen up to my new cd

18.
(You’ve got the power in there)
(Waving your wand in the air)
Time after time those fanatical minds
Try to rule all the world

19.
If I ask you difficult questions
If I make improper suggestions
Would you find that a risk to your health
Would you put me up on the bookself

20.
Throw away the radio
Suitcase…Keeps you awake
Hide the telephone, the telephone
Telephone in case…You realize that…

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