Archive for the ‘Personal’ Category

Oh my, it’s been almost two years to the date since I last posted. Sorry for such a long hiatus. With the prompting of many (ok, really, just a few) I’ve decided to give this here blog another whirl. I can’t promise I’ll stick to it, but I will try, darn it. I will try.

Let’s see, since I left my dear old blog sitting and rotting not much has changed in my life.

We adopted a new kitteh…Waffle. I was NOT at all for this new addition but my, then, 11 yr. old child talked me into it by saying, “He’s cheaper than a Wii or Xbox”. Ha. If only I had known how much $ this little boy would cost me with his food allergies and habit of eating string & clothing! He is a cutie pie, though so I guess we’ll keep him.

I now have a 13 yr. old with blue hair…

Oops. Wrong picture.

Here we go….

I gained a ton of weight from boozing it up…

And baking and eating yummy crap non-stop….

Haha. I really DIDN’T become a boozer…I just had to use that photo somewhere on here! I did, however, gain a ton of weight because of my obsession with making homemade rice pudding, cherry cobbler and mac & cheese. Someone had to eat it!

I lost a ton of weight because I stopped baking and started eating only fruits & veggies and lean protein. This is a true story. Yay, me!

I became a photographer (I think I’ve always been a photographer, it’s just that now I get paid to do it so it seems more real!)…

Check me out, please: sharongollnitzphotography.com

Oh, and I started making a line of lip balm and all natural body products…

I bought a new (used) vehicle with all the gobs of money I’m making. Um, yeah. If that were true it wouldn’t be a 2005 Santa Fe.

And that, my friends, is all I’ve done in the past 2 years. Sorry to disappoint.

Let’s hope something exciting happens in the next few days so I have something to write about!


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Now, before you run away gagging…let me just say that possum (or opossum to some of you) stew is one of the finer things in life. NOT! Ha. Gotcha! I can’t say that I’ve actually ever had possum stew, nor would I ever choose to do so. But here’s a good story and I had to lead up to it somehow…

The other evening whilst sitting on the couch I noticed a faint scratching noise that sounded like it was coming from the front windows in my living room. As I turned the volume down on the tv, sure enough, it WAS a scratching sound coming from underneath the windows. I looked outside but couldn’t see anything rustling in the bushes. I knocked on the window. Still nothing. So, because I am a big chicken and thought that it surely must be rat in my cellar (even though I have NEVER had a rat in my cellar), I went to bed without looking in the basement.

The next afternoon I heard the scratching again and because it was daylight, and knew the boogie monster wouldn’t get me if I went into the cellar at this time of day, I headed down with a flashlight. I went straight to where I had heard the noise the night before. You see, I have a set of basement windows right underneath the living room windows. These windows are ancient, dirty as hell and double paned. Not the double-paned as in the modern, two pieces of glass that are millimeters apart and make up one window –  but two separate windows that have approximately 3-1/2″ of space between them.

And what to my wondering eyes should appear? Something gray…and hairy…and breathing! Gah! I almost ran away screaming but my curiosity got the best of me. I approached slowly with the flashlight and as I got closer I realized it was a baby possum. Phew! I could barely see in the widows as they are covered in dirt. Very clever how they installed them so there is absolutely NO way to clean them. Anyway, as I inspected further I could see that next to the little possum was what used to be his/her sibling. Splayed out. Dead. With flies crawling all over it.

I ran back upstairs fretting about what to do. My child got wind of my anxiousness and asked what was wrong. I had to tell her. And then she started crying, insisting that we had to “SAVE” him “NOW”. Great.

I grabbed a hammer and headed outside to see if I could somehow break the window open without killing the poor thing. No luck. That glass would not budge. I couldn’t really take a good whack at it as I was afraid the hammer would end up in the possum’s skull. So, I called my Dad and he came to the rescue with his expert glass-breaking technique. We coaxed the little fella out with cat food. It leaned out of the window just enough to gobble up the food. I’m sure it wouldn’t move any further because we were all standing around gawking at it. My child, of course, thought it was cute and wanted to keep it. It started to show its teeth when we moved closer. My first inclination was to whack it with something. Nice. I just save the poor, starving animal and now I want to kill it.


I have no idea how long it had been inbetween the windows. Long enough for two of his siblings to die. Yes, two! After he climbed out we saw that there was another dead baby – he had been sitting on it. Ick. So, now I have a broken basement window full of dead stank. I wonder how long it will take for the bodies to disintegrate, because I sure as hell am not going to touch that stuff! Can I interest anyone in some possum carcass for stew??

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Spring, glorious Spring! It’s finally here and I have spent the last few days outside. I even got all the patio furniture out and had coffee on the deck this morning…it was 75 degrees at 7:30 a.m. Unheard of around here. I can’t remember ever getting to sit on the deck this early in the year. Woo hoo! I love it. I love the blue skies…


and the flowers. Ahhhhh!

Even the moss looks lush after all the winter drab…


E wanted to know why I was on my knees taking a picture at the base of the tree. I said, “E, look at all this GREEN!”

The dogs are loving the sunshine.



Now, if I could just get Ridley to stop barking at the new neighbor’s dog and cat. He spends hours just sitting and waiting for a peek at them.

The fresh air makes everyone tired.



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The weather in New York state is all but predictable. A few days ago I woke to find the thermometer reading -5 degrees. Holy shit, that’s cold even for a born and bred Northerner. Then, a few days later it’s a whopping 50 degrees. Yep, that’s right. And people wonder why I’m so cranky.

Since it had warmed up so much I figured it was about time that I took the rotting pumpkin off my front porch and threw it in the compost pile. I was finally able to make my way out the back door, across the deck (which now only has about one foot of compacted snow/ice on it as opposed to the 3 feet of snow it had on it a week ago) and out to the compost pile behind the garage. But…not without incident. You see, as I approached the steps leading down to the backyard my heel hit a piece of ice and WHHHHOOOOOSH! There I went. Sliding at full speed down the steps (which were actually more like an ice slide since I hadn’t shoveled them in months) and landing with a hard cruuunch on my ass. Ouch. Surprisingly enough, I didn’t drop the pumpkin. It was still planted firmly in my hands which meant that my ass took a terrible beating since I didn’t use my hands to break the fall. I started laughing, as I often do when I do something foolish and get hurt. Both of the dogs were outside and Gus came rushing to my side, licking my face as I laughed hysterically. I was still lying on the ground when I looked up to see this coming at me:


Yeah. Crazy. Ferocious. Dog.

Ridley gets spastic in the snow and it didn’t help that his mom was lying there laughing, holding a pumpkin. He came bounding toward me and pounced right on top of me. Barking and nipping like his Borderline Collie self. He then decided this was going to be a get-the-pumpkin game and started coming at me from all sides trying to pry the rotting pumpkin from my hands. This made me laugh even harder. And then it happened. I peed my pants. Oh, come on! Don’t tell me that if you fell on your ass into the cold, melting snow you, TOO, wouldn’t wet yourself!

By the time I got myself up and walked into the house, tears were streaming down my cheeks from laughing so hard. My child just looked at me, shook her head in disgust and in her motherly tone said, “What is wrong with you?” I didn’t have the heart to tell her the truth so I crept upstairs and hit the shower. Damn weather. Damn dogs. Damn bladder.

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Besides working at my new job, which I love, I’ve been very busy…busy crafting. Crafting for Cora.

This story came to my attention last month and I was immediately drawn in by this sweet baby girl and her family. You can read about Cora here.

Sadly, baby Cora went to heaven on February 8th. Please keep all those who knew and loved Cora in your thoughts and prayers. I couldn’t stop thinking about this precious baby girl and her parents and I knew I had to help in some small way. So, I joined other etsy craftspeople who have banded together to craft for Cora.

A playground is being built to honor her life. You can make a donation by directly visiting http://corapaige.blogspot.com. You can also click HERE and purchase one of the many beautiful hand-crafted items from etsy shop owners who have banded together and are donating  the profits from these special Cora Paige items towards helping build Cora’s playground.

This is such a wonderful way to honor an amazing little life. Please do what you can.

To learn more about Cora’s Playground visit:



So, for the past week and a half I’ve been crocheting, sewing, and even collage-ing like a mad woman. Here’s just a sampling of what I’m selling on etsy for Cora – 100% of the proceeds will go towards the Cora Playground Fund:





ps: I promise I’ll be around to visit all of you very soon.  I miss you and will catch up as soon as I can!

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Walmart is not my friend this week. Well, really, I can’t blame Walfart…it’s not the corporation that I’m fed up with, it’s the ignorant, common senseless, rude, annoying customers and employees that are causing my ire.

I should have know it was going to be a bad day when I got in the car and yelled, “I hate everything”. Not a good way to start the day. Oh, did I mention, I’m premenstrual. Yeah. That explains it all. So, as I pull into the Walfart parking lot I’m quite happy to find a fairly decent parking spot seeing as we have a billion tons of snow and negative wind chills. I pull into the spot and start to exit the vehicle. I hear a horn honking but think nothing of it. I hear it again and again, getting more frantic and louder. I then realize that the honking is coming from a minivan that is reversing toward me as I get out of my car. The minivan pulls right up next to me and my daughter as we begin our trudge to the store. And what do we see? A psychotic female driver, one hand still on the horn, the other flailing wildly in the air as she mouths something I cannot understand. She continues to yell and point at my car. I realize what she is trying to tell me through the rolled up windows of her minivan. I took her parking spot. WHAT? Seriously lady? She continues to scream “YOU TOOK MY SPOT”, without ever rolling down her window. I’m completely fired up at this point and scream right back at her “LADY, YOU WERE HALFWAY UP THE ROW. I DIDN’T EVEN SEE YOUR VEHICLE UNTIL YOU ALMOST RAN ME OVER! I’M NOT A MIND READER. I DIDN’T REALIZE THIS SPOT HAD YOUR NAME ON IT.” My child starts snickering and I grab her by the arm and we head toward the store. The frickin’ lady starts beeping her horn AT ME AGAIN. Oh man, I was SO ready to turn and run at her vehicle and offer her some more words of advice. But, I bit my tongue and walked away seeing as the little one was with me. And guess what mini 2LD tells me to do? She says, “Give it to her Mom…give her the finger!” The woman sat in her vehicle for a few moments…I think she actually thought I was going to climb back into my car and offer up the spot. Ha. Not so much. When she finally realized she was out of luck she sped past us, still yelling and flailing.

Now, I’m thoroughly annoyed and don’t quite feel like shopping but I’m on a mission. I need paint for my bedroom walls because, you see, I found a picture in Pottery Barn of these lovely brown walls and I decided I just HAD to have that color…TODAY. Thing is, the Pottery Barn paint is Benjamin Moore paint. We all know I’m little miss thrift and I’m certainly not going to spend $30 on a gallon of paint – especially when I’m only going to paint two walls. So, smarty me – I go to the Benjamin Moore store, get a swatch of the color I want and take that swatch to Walmart so the paint person can color match it. Wooooo!…..saving me about $17.  I’ve had a custom color made before, it’s no big deal; the swatch is scanned and the computer comes up with a match. I proceed to have ‘Larry’ the paint guy make me my oh-so-lovely brown custom color. Apparently, it was Larry’s first day with the color match system. The color that Larry reveals when he opens the can makes both me and my daughter cringe. It’s not brown. Oh, no. It’s a washed-out sort of cranberry color. I explain that I will certainly not be painting my bedroom walls red, to which Larry replies, “It’s a custom color, you have to take it.” I respond, “The color you’ve made does not MATCH, and doesn’t even come close to the color on the swatch that I brought in so I would certainly hope I wouldn’t be required to purchase it.” Larry’s response, “Well, then you can go argue with my manager about it.” Me (trying very hard not to yell),  “Oh, you bet I will, just point me in his direction”.

I guess Larry didn’t feel like getting reprimanded on this particular day because as soon as those words came out of my mouth his tune changed. He was going to go out of his way to ensure I got the color I wanted. He fiddled around with the swatch a few more times, ran it through the computer again, added some more colors and finally…an almost perfect match. He was suddenly very apologetic and thanked me for being patient. Damn skippy, Larry, ’cause I was gonna turn your ass into management.

Momma’s all happy now that she has her cheap, almost perfectly matched paint, now all we have to do is check out and we’re home free. Check out is usually not a problem because we use the self check-out. Momma can swipe those barcodes waaaay faster than those checkout gals! Except today. Wouldn’t you know. We get behind some freakish girl who, with only a few items, takes almost 10 frickin’ minutes to check out. Why? Because she has to put her gloves on to touch the screen, then she takes her gloves off to bag the item, then the gloves go back on to touch the screen, and so on, for the next 5 items. I stand there gritting my teeth, trying to find a magazine to look at to distract me. The girl can tell I’m obviously agitated. Gee, ya think? Who the heck goes through these crazy maneuvers just to check out? But wait, it gets better. After she scans her last item, she carefully removes her gloves,  fishes in her purse and finally retrieves money. And guess what? She doesn’t have enough money for her purchase. OMG. She has to call an associate over to remove her supersize bag of Doritoes. I’m so flippin’ agitated at this point I’m quite sure my face is pure red. The girl turns to me and says, “Thank you for being so patient”. I smile (now I feel bad for being such an uber-impatient/intolerant person). On top of it all she makes sure to tell me to have a great day…and I, of course, tell her to do the same.  Geez…can’t a girl just be agitated for ONE stinkin’ day without some nice person ruining it?

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Woo hoo! Hope you all had a great New Year. And no, JQ and my other FB followers…the Twister game didn’t even get started. Someone stole my freakin’ Twister game! Imagine that. So, alas, no naked Twister. I didn’t even stay up to ring in the New Year. Nope. I was plumb tuckered out. It didn’t help that I got to spend my New Year’s Eve morning at the doctor’s – having my yearly cystoscopy. Go ahead, look it up, you know you want to. I’ll spare you the details. Anyway, I felt like crap afterward and ended up napping until around 7 p.m. Sheesh, I’m getting old. It’s all good, though, I needed to get some rest seeing as I have a few busy days ahead of me. Because…guess what? I’m meeting one of my blog buddies…in real life! I’m terribly excited about meeting him and spending a few days enjoying fine food, wine and conversation. Oh, and maybe even a photo outting or two. What better way to start the New Year? If you want to know more read this.

I’ll be back soon to give you all the juicy details…including pictures!

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