It was Saturday evening and I took my daughter to her friend’s birthday party. This friend lives in bum fuck Egypt – complete with horses, goats, chickens, lots of mud…you get the idea. The birthday girl’s mother is a good friend of mine, so I’m invited to ‘hang’ with the adults whilst the kids partake in birthday festivities. I’m chatting with a couple parents in the dining room, we’re drinking beer, casually watching the festivities when there’s a knock at the door. One of the adults opens the door and a haggard looking woman appears. She explains that her car has just broken down and she needs to telephone a friend to come help her. Someone hands her the phone, she looks at it strangely, as if she’s never seen one before, and then asks for a phone book. What? Can’t remember anyone’s number? After several awkward minutes of someone fumbling for a phone book – one is produced and she makes the call. She hangs up the phone, stares at us and asks, “What’s going on? A party?” (Ah, duh? ya think? Balloons, kids, games, cake = birthday party)
She pauses for a moment and asks, “Mind if I have a beer while I wait?”. WTF? (Are you serious lady? Who DOES shit like that?) We all just glance at each other trying not to burst out laughing and someone pipes up, “Sure, help yourself”. Unbelievably enough, she grabs a beer, proceeds to open it, guzzles it down; then with a toothless grin waves goodbye and is out the door. Holy crap, I felt like we were in an episode of the Twilight Zone. No one says a word, we all just sit there in stunned silence with our mouths agape. Again, WTF? What the hell was she thinking?
Two Lazy Dogs 
Door to door beer bumming hobos are quite common in bum fuck Egypt. That country is going to hell in a hand basket. That and the goat diddlers are ruining their economy. Mark my words, as soon as they hit rock bottom, I’m gonna slide up in there, take over, and pronounce myself KING! 😉
Ahhhhhh…my Dear Mr. Parkour…what type of crown shall we get you??
She was thinking, “FREE BEER” I mean, looking as haggard as she did, she knew nobody was going to challenger her or ask her to leave. I’m LOL just imagining your faces – WTF???
I’m surprised she didn’t help herself to some cake!!!
I have never heard THAT one before…it’s laughable and creepy. 🙂
Yes…pretty creepy…we were all numbfounded!
haha
I’m surprised she didn’t ask for one for the road.
Oh…I bet she was thinking about it!
Would it have been rude to make her sing the birthday song before being given a beer?
OhH!! I didn’t even think of that…we should have made her participate!!!
Are you kidding!?! Freaky!!!
Yeah…what a surprise here in Suckytown!!
Maybe her car broke down because her drunk ass wrapped it around a tree or one of those pyramids in BFE.
Ha!…or maybe she hit a cow?!?!
Omigosh! Allison, can you imagine the birthday pictures,,….years from now, fliipping through the photo album: Oh loook, heres your birthday and look, in that group of people singing happy birthday, see the one holding the corona with no teeth? she was some vagrant we invited in to sing happy birthday to you. Wasn’t that sweet dear…
Start the therapy now…..
Ya know, you coulda offered me two.
Damn it, Red, I didn’t recognize you! You were looking a bit haggard that night!!
looks like you need to find new people to hang out with !!
Yeah…I was thinking maybe some of those folks down in sunny south!